Celebrating Advent :: Part 1

You are all so kind! I feel so blessed by your many well-wishes. I am still sick ... the laryngitis has passed and been replaced with a cough. Yuck! I don't get sick often, but when I do, it seems that I get every possible symptom.

I know that December is still a few weeks away, but I thought I'd share these ideas with you now so you'll have time to think about them if they resonate for you.

Spreading out the holiday season is very important to me. The idea of one single, over-stimulating, and -- ultimately -- disappointing day is very unappealing to my mama soul, and not so good for the wee ones, either. The more that we can do to celebrate a holiday season, the better, in my eyes. So to that end, we have a very involved advent tradition, into which we have incorporated many of our other family holiday traditions. We also celebrate the 12 Days of Christmas, ending on Three Kings Day (January 6). During that time, we are still in merry-making mode, but we try to ever-so-gently wind things down.

As I wrote this post, I realized that it was far too much information for one day, so I'm going to divide it up into three days this week. Today I'll talk about the advent calendar. On Wednesday, I'll share a very long list of ideas for things to put into the calendar once you've got it set up. And on Friday, I'll share a little bit about the tradition of the advent wreath. These ideas have been accumulated over my 5.5 years of mothering and from my own childhood as well.

Advent Calendar

The first thing to do is to come up with some sort of advent calendar "vessel". This can be just about anything. We have 24 stockings strung on a garland. Years ago (2003, to be precise), Martha Stewart Kids showed a sock garland calendar made with baby socks, number stickers, and clothespins. It's not up on their website Here it is, although they do show this one, which requires sewing, and this cute one, made of boxes. (I made ours three or four years ago using this kit from Magic Cabin.) I have a friend who uses 24 beautiful paper cones. You could use a variation on the pocket calendar, based on something like this, this or this. Kim made these gorgeous little cornucopias. You don't even have to have 24. You could use a single beautiful bowl, tray, or piece of pottery, and the gifts could appear in it each morning. And each vessel does not have to be large enough to "hold" the day's gift. Our gifts frequently don't fit in our tiny stockings, so they simply await the children on a chair or stool beneath the garland. We do have a little elf who travels from stocking to stocking day by day as a visual aid to the passing of the days.

Another variation is to have a 12-day calendar and use it to celebrate the 12 Days of Christmas instead. Then you only have to come up with 12 ideas, and you can spread Christmas out in the more traditional manner. (Traditionally, the Christmas/Yule season began on that day, rather than ending on it!)

Now that you've got a vessel of some sort, you have to come up with little gifts to put in it for 24 consecutive days (I know, I am a crazy person). This can get very expensive, very quickly, if you approach it with the idea that each day must contain an actual "gift" for each of your children. I try to think about things that we would be doing anyway, and make those things fit into our celebration of advent, rather than the other way around. For example, we would always make cookies one day, visit holiday lighting displays one or more days, and put up/decorate our tree one day. The same idea applies to things we'd spend money on anyway. Is there something that my child needs now that can't wait until Christmas? That goes into the calendar. We have the tradition of wearing new pajamas on Christmas Eve, so they started appearing on the last day of the calendar. We would buy a new, special holiday or winter book for our family each year anyway, so we incorporated that into the calendar. One of the most important things that I can recommend to you if you are just beginning with this tradition is to keep it pretty low-key and low-pressure. If you set your children up to expect an actual "gift" every day, they will feel disappointed if sometimes it's not. If most days they find coupons or tickets incorporating an activity that would happen in your home anyway, it gives them the security of predictability, and keeps it from becoming another commitment for you to buy a lot more expensive gifts.

The key here is keep it simple and manageable for the parents. I usually sit down in November with the calendar and figure out which days, according to my husband's work and gig schedule and my cello teaching schedule, we will do our usual family outings and activities. I think about the more "gifty" things I have acquired (or plan to), and try to spread those out at fairly wide intervals. I look at the days we're going to celebrate other festivals (St Nicholas's visit on the 6th, Santa Lucia's Day on the 13th) and think about ways that I can either incorporate the celebration of those festivals into the calendar (a Santa Lucia crown on the 13th, for example) or something simple that won't distract from the main event. (Since St Nicholas brings chocolate and a small gift to my children, I keep the advent calendar very simple on that day.) Once I have the main things plugged into my calendar, I fill it in with simple crafts or small things that I have on hand.

I like to have as much as possible on hand and parceled out according to date before Dec. 1 so that no matter how tired or busy I've been on some December day, the advent calendar won't be a cause for stress right before I go to bed. The easier I can make this for myself, the more enjoyable it is for everyone. 

So, make it fun for yourself, keep it light-hearted and simple, and it can be a really lovely family tradition that helps to spread out the season and mark the s-l-o-w passage of the days for the wee ones.

On Wednesday you'll get a very long list of ideas for things to put into the calendar, some of which we've tried in our home and some of which I just thought of as I was preparing these posts. Enjoy!

Comments

[emily]

grace, i am always awed and inspired by your family traditions. and those little pouches - are they the daily gifts with those beautiful tags? how absolutely lovely all around.

[Tina]

Can't wait to hear parts 2 and 3! I'm thinking about making an Advent Calendar this year, but I'm still trying to figure that out. I haven't even thought about what to put in there yet! I like the idea of incorporating things you would do anyway, like trimming the tree, making cookies, etc.

[Sarah]

Gosh there are a lot of advent calendars out there, aren't there? I didn't even see any of the ideas you linked to when I was trolling for ideas myself!

Your stockings are gorgeous little things.

[Jennifer]

How fun! Last year we did a "creativity for the nativity" advent with a new craft each day. This year, without such a stash of crafts, we are doing what you describe - gifts, books, activities, treats... and I'm so eager to add to my ideas on Wednesday!
Thanks!

[Bluebirdbaby]

Very nice Grace!! Sorry I haven't replied yet to your e-mail, it's been a bit hectic here. I can quickly say I am looking forward to you next posts because this is giving us a lot of ideas for starting our own traditions!! Thank you and I hope you are feeling much better now :)

[Qalballah]

Yikes! This is what you can manage when you are sick I must remember to be frightened of your creative energy when you are well! We don't 'do' Christmas but I like the idea of having a season of family tradition rather than just working toward one day. Great idea and forward planning!

[Mary Beth]

My mother did an Advent calendar for us each year and it is one of my most cherished holiday memories. Now I am so lucky to have the actual advent calendar--which I love and is beautiful--to pass on the tradition with my own children. I'm looking forward to posting about it on my blog closer to December 1st--when it's all ready. I have struggled with not making it too expensive or too materialistic or too sugary. I'm evolving toward fewer gifts and more intangibles and am in a tranistion phase this year, I think. I'm so looking forward to your other two advent posts this week!

[dottycookie]

I love this post. We have a little wooden advent tree that has tiny decorations, and each day in December the "Christmas Elf" comes and leaves a decoration to be put on the tree. This year we have made proper calendars for him to leave his decorations in - and we may add in some of your ideas too! Looking fowrd to the other posts ...

[Sarah]

Thanks for this wonderful post. We have several little Advent calendars with the little opening flaps, but I love the way you do your and I'm going to try to incorporate that into our own family traditions this year. I'm very much looking forward to your Wednesday and Friday posts.

[Mary Beth]

Thank you for this. I am trying to get away from my childhood tradition of a huge extravaganza on Christmas morning and to establish some simpler traditions for my own children. It's so helpful to hear about other families' celebrations. I hope you will also write sometime about what you all do on Christmas day.

[lina]

Wow, I'm impressed with the amount of thought, love and organisation that goes into your advent calendar. This year, I've so far been merely obsessed with sewing the perfect "vessel". I haven't even started on its possible contents. Looking forward to your next posts!

[Mama Urchin]

I've been thinking about advent already too. I'm looking forward to reading your other posts.

[kim]

You are a crafty goddess my dear!! I'm getting holiday twitchy over here.

Hope you feel up to your ole' (not old!!) self soon.
kisses

[Laura]

Love your ideas, The season of Advent is very important & special in our home. Each evening we share a special reading or book & light a candle.

Laura

[meg]

Oh, and enjoy I shall! I'm enjoying this already. Last year, I tried to institute an advent calendar, but I think I was the only one that was enjoying it (which wasn't all that much fun.) Hope springs eternal, though -- I may try again this year yet!

[Louise]

We did this for the first time last year and my girls loved it. Now I have to think up some new ideas so I'll be back for your list. I put a little poem in so they could guess what it was for that day. I love your stockings - really sweet.

[patience]

Thank you for this, its exactly what I need to prepare my own Advent. I'm very much looking forward to your list.

[Alicia A.]

Thank you, Grace, for your lovely ideas. We have a nice holiday season here at home this year, so I think I'll do some sort of Advent calendar too.

[Michelle]

I have been pondering what I wanted to do for advent this year. My daughter is 3 now and I want to make the season more than a day and I thought advent was a good start. I only did chocolate advent calendars as a child and I wanted more than that. This post was wonderful and got me thinking! I am excited to see the rest of your ideas! Thank you.

[Melissa!]

I made that Martha Stewart advent stocking calendar! I have 24 little ornaments that get rewrapped every year and hung on it's own little tree. Each ornament gets placed in a different stocking and opened on a different day every year so it's still a lovely 'surprise'. The ornament on Dec 24th is the same, though, and my girls look forward to that ornament. It took me awhile to pull this together because I sought out 24 ornaments that not only were little in size but were significant to us as a family. So each day approaching Christmas reminds us of the love & memories we share. The downfall is sometimes I don't hang the advent calendar up until we're a few days into December so my girls play catch-up. Thanks to your post, I am going to make an effort to bring it down a few days before December!

[shukr]

*The idea of one single, over-stimulating, and -- ultimately -- disappointing day is very unappealing to my mama soul, and not so good for the wee ones, either*

I found the same with 'eid al fitr the last few years, as we carried our previous holiday experiences into one day, so this year we started to make more of Ramadan itself, ( which is a month long after all, and really the whole point of it! - who wants to listen to children asking 'when is 'eid' for 29/30 days!?!), and we enjoyed the whole month as special instead, as it should be enjoyed.
I'm sure I will be able to incorporate some of your ideas into our next fasting month, and we have another eid just around the corner, so will be aiming to make that more special this year too.

Thank you.

[Stephanie :)]

Its so nice to know that other mums put as much effort into the whole advent thing as I do.
I use walnuts, which I carefully open, empty and insert a little gift in, before sticking both sides together with a ribbon sandwiched between.(If you can picture this!!) We then hang the long ribbon up and snip a walnut off each day:) The challenge is finding tiny presents. A crystal,
a little bee's wax person, tiny bells, a needle felted mouse etc etc. Small is nice I think:) I so agree with keeping it simple!

[Stephanie :)]

Its so nice to know that other mums put as much effort into the whole advent thing as I do.
I use walnuts, which I carefully open, empty and insert a little gift in, before sticking both sides together with a ribbon sandwiched between.(If you can picture this!!) We then hang the long ribbon up and snip a walnut off each day:) The challenge is finding tiny presents. A crystal,
a little bee's wax person, tiny bells, a needle felted mouse etc etc. Small is nice I think:) I so agree with keeping it simple!

[Kara]

What a wonderful topic! I really, really love this time of year ... not just for the outward things, but for the inward time of reflection, too.

I agree with you, too, it is difficult (especially for children) to have all the wonder of this time of year just crammed into one day and then over and done with. We try to spread things out, too and it is partly why we started celebrating St. Nicholas Day and the Advent. (I'm considering buying an Advent kit this year ... but maybe I'll get something together homemade, too.)

I'm looking forward to hearing about how your family celebrates 3 Kings Day.

Glad you're feeling a bit better! Best Wishes!

[misschris]

Wonderful. Thank you for taking the time to share your ideas ... especially when you are under the weather. :) Get well!

[amanda]

Thank you so much for this post! It is just perfect, I am so inspired. I cannot wait to get started. Do you mind if I link to this post at my blog?

[Cypress]

Whoa, lady!! A three-parter?! And I thought you were crazy over Halloween...I see that your madness extends to all family celebrations! I'm looking forward to your next few posts. Thank you so much for sharing all this with the rest of us!

[andi]

Grace, I don't know if I have ever commented on your blog before, but I have been a lurker for awhile- I really enjoy your blog and your thoughts on motherhood and crafting and everything in between. Just thought I would pop in and say hello and tell you that I love this post and how intentional you are about creating memories and traditions with your family. So very inspiring to me!

[Amy]

What a thoughtful and intentional way to spend the season. Thanks for sharing your experiences. I can't wait to hear the rest and get more ideas. I'm going to give this a try this year for sure!!

[Lisa Clarke]

OH, what wonderful ideas - I look forward to your next post on the subject. We did an Advent calendar last year with our boys, and they enjoyed it, but it was really just a store-bought cardboard calendar with a bit of chocolate on each day. How much more special would a homemade calendar be, filled with meaningful tokens? I'm going to give this some thought, and hope that I can get it together enough to pull it off this year. Thanks for the push!

[Mae]

I pleased to see you promoting Advent. We have really minimalized the big season to the point that I Hardly bought anything last year at all. With teens of course, this is largely impossible! I had sort of let the whole "Advent Calendar" idea slide as our kids got older. After reading your post, I will give some thought to returning it in some form ...

[Lizz]

sweet

[Sarah]

I have a confession to make--I don't know how I feel an Advent calendar that provides little gifts to my kids every day of the month. It feels very materialistic to me. We have always had an Advent Calendar with beautiful pictures behind the doors, but not gifts. I want the season to be filled with the joy of making things for others rather than the gesture of receiving something (even if it's an acorn) daily. Does this make any sense or am I an old scrooge?? This is also about me and my family and not a criticism of others.

[Stacey]

So now I feel a little pressed to figure out how to blend these ideas with Chanukkah. Eight days rather than twelve, a focus on light and justice... hmm the wheels are turning, thanks for the inspiration.

[Kari]

This is such a perfect post for me to accidentally stumble upon! I am making an advent calendar right now (just cut the fabric and ready to hem). I had the same idea of having a fun activity each day - and maybe a bit of chocolate. Hee hee...

I really want to stretch the season so it isn't about the gifts. I want us to have a fun tradition each day and fill the month with memories.

[Eren]

Wonderful as always Grace...I WILL make an advent calendar. That way our playmobil advent calendar can just be played with like it always is. Blessings friend.

[kristin]

finally. i have gotten to sit down and actually *read* this post. next up are your ideas for content. this is so great and much appreciated. we have little flags (like your stockings, but squares) :) i haven't thought of what i'll be putting in there this year. your idea to actually PLAN out the things to do NOW is great. i needed this motivation. we do a bit of small treasures and things to do as well - a happy mix of both. can't wait to read the second half of this post...

[Tamara]

Thanks so much for all of this. We always did a calendar when I was young but this is the first year that I am going to do it with my family. I love all the ideas and i am sure it will help me get started!

I found your blog from unplugyourkids.

[Melissa]

I'm so excited to read through your advent series. It looks wonderful, thank you for sharing.

[Melissa]

Thank you for sharing your ideas because you have inspired me to start the advent finally for our family. Each year I want to do this but never get the push to do it. This year I have and made paper cones from magazine pages as it is shown on onehourcraft site. I still haven't figured out what all the items or things we will do inside the paper cones but at least this year I've got it started.

Our advent candles are out and we are started the book "Jotham's Journey" for the advent season. It's a wonderful book.