Reminders

I began this post more than a year ago -- in January of 2007 -- and for some reason, even after revisiting it a few times, I have never published it. But after my two weeks away from the computer, and stepping back into this space with fresh "eyes", I feel like there is something in this post that I want to share with you now.

One afternoon in January of 2007, when I began this post, our little family was sitting together in the living room, and looking around the room, I really felt struck by the fact that we were (and are) growing into the family I'd always hoped we would. As I sat in the chair knitting this hat, my husband and James built with blocks, and Elisabeth, in typical Elisabeth fashion, flitted happily between one very creative activity to another. (From costumes to hairstyles to art projects to movement and music ... she is the most alive person I have ever known.)

Although it was not the first time the four of us were playing and creating side-by-side, it was one of the first times that I stopped to realize how important this is to me.

Despite many struggles with raising our children, with jobs & money, and lack of time, my husband and I have managed to create a space, or even a moment in time, where peace and creativity flourish. This is so very important to me, and the moments in which these values are truly captured are very special.

I am under no delusion that our children will magically circumvent becoming aloof, even disdainful, teenagers. (I can always hope, though!) But in this moment, while they are still so very little, I am glad that we are placing value on creating together, on working with our hands, and on making and doing rather than waiting for the next outside stimulus to come and sweep us along. I hope that this "foundation" will serve them well later, even when a time comes that they are ready to move on from our little family of four into a bigger world.

I'm thinking about all of this once again as I re-examine what it means for me to be blogging. I received the sweetest, most generous, honest, and inspiring email from a long-time blog reader the day before yesterday. Her words, and the fact that she has drawn inspiration from my life and my family in her own life, on the other side of the earth, humbled and moved me very deeply. Thank you, Iris.

There is something amazing about the connections to be found through this medium, and the opportunities it presents to so many of us are kind of astounding. But, I also have found that the flipside of this (for me) can be a tendency to come across too perfect. I've read discussions around blogland about this, and I have never quite agreed with it. I think it's completely fine to keep the negative elements of my life to myself, and to choose to be positive here. And I am most definitely a perfectionist. I work very slowly, whether it's sewing, knitting, or any other "work." In fact, I think some of you might laugh at how very slowly I sew on the machine! This is to say that I do strive for perfection all the time, because I am a person who gets anxious about small mistakes.

But, I'm not perfect. I make lots of mistakes in my art, work, and life. I'm not a perfect mother. I struggle every single day with remaining present with my children, with balancing my own needs and wants as an individual with the often very disparate needs and wants of two children, and the everyday tasks of a household. When I started this blog, stepping out of severe depression, I started it for myself. My intention was to record one beautiful and positive thing about my life each day, when all the days seemed to run together. For a long time, I believe that I was successful at this. But after a while, I think my focus shifted away from my original intention and more toward "fitting in" with other bloggers. And not that there's anything so harmful in that (what a great group of women (and men, too!), artists, mothers, and creators to fit into!) but I feel like I lost my focus, and lost a little bit of what made this space so very special to me.

So, I am beginning again, reminding myself that the blog is for me, for fun, and for remembering that there are small miracles in every single day, not just the days when I have a craft to show off or a fantastic photo to share.

Thank you to those of you who choose to spend a little bit of your own precious time here with me -- every day, or just once in a while. I hope you will keep visiting, and leaving comments for me. I hope that my new commitment to focus on the special, small moments in my day-to-day life (and crafts, too!) will touch you and bring a little bit of joy and beauty into your days.

love, Grace

PS: The photos here are from our trail walk today. I shared them here because of the peace that my children exude when they are free like this. Their squabbles seem to melt away on the trail.

Comments

[Tammy]

I love this post. I could get all wordy and still not say what I am thinking, so how about just this....

I love this post.

:)

[Gretchen]

I have been lurking on your site for almost a year, and this post just moved me so much that I had to leave a comment. Thank you for sharing this, your thoughts, and your beautiful family with the world.

Gretchen

[emily]

this post is so grace. (big smiles.)

[julia]

thank you for this reminder. i think it can be helpful to many of us (myself included). i love visiting you here and it is very inspiring to me to see how you are raising your children and creating a beautiful, meaningful family. thank you for sharing the beauty of your life with all of us.

[leslie]

so great grace! so very great.

[Bluebirdbaby]

You are so very right. I'm much too tired to comment on the emotions I felt while reading this (it's past 11 p.m. here!), but I want you to know that I hear you. I find inspiration in *you*...not only in your beautiful creations and amazing photography, but in you. Thank you for that.

[Ella]

This focus and your thoughtfulness is exactly what i love about reading your blog. Whether it is carefully worded or spontaneously written, you apparently write deeply & emotionally and i appreciate your sharing. The snippets that you share come across quite real and honestly, your projects are inspiring and photos beautiful.
While i may not have the time to connect here daily or even weekly, i find that i always prepare myself (making sure i have the time) to sit, read and truly take in your posts when i do click on your link.
Thank you Uncommon Grace.

[amy j.]

I haven't been reading your blog for long, but I just wanted to tell you I appreciate your candor. I've been blogging about my family for about three years. And while I've shared things that are stressful in my life (my six year old daughter is a Type 1 diabetic) I too at times have found that I get very irritated at the blogworld, even with all it's beauty and inspiration, not being as honest as I'd like to see...among mothers especially. I have found myself feeling inadequate at times when looking at these beautiful blogs and wonderful portrayals...and then trying my best to, perhaps, be equal to some degree. The other day, on a particularly stressful weekend with my two girls over a very LONG spring break for my year round schooler, I thought about writing about how I don't always enjoy motherhood...or even being with my children. I KNOW other mothers feel this. I know we all struggle with being good moms and loving our children and doing what we should to teach and nurture them. But we all do struggle too with our own needs and frustrations and simple longing to be left alone at times. I feel like you that there are moments in each of our lives for true gratitude and ultimate perfection. I feel that alot with my own life. But at other times there is just...well, this SUCKS. Ya know. And I think, if you're gonna share your life with the "world" you must share both sides. Whether you do or not, I enjoy your blog immensely and wish I was one tenth as creative. I own a sewing machine that has never been out of the box. I LONG to sew and create, yet I find no time and am terribly intimidated. One day. One day.

[Dawn]

This was beautiful. Your blog inspires me.

[Lorien]

Beautiful Grace! I concur;)

[Mary Beth]

Personally I prefer the simple posts about our daily pleasures rather than the "fitting in" posts. Well said, Grace.

[Iris]

Ok, deep breath and first comment! Grace, great post and wonderful pictures. It's your portrayal of the everyday moments that stay with me during the day and the time I spend with my own children. They are such a reminder to me to find the beauty in the everyday and to make time for the here and now. Obviously, there's a 'wow' factor about a lot of your amazing crafting and I love to see your latest projects, but that's not what keeps me checking in here. Great to have you back!

[Sebrina]

Oh Grace: I just love this post and this exactly why I first started reading your blog!

[Tara]

It's funny how many similar themes are floating through the blogosphere this week- just today I published a post on being so less than perfect as a homeschooler, and it all was tangled up with pics of our nature walk. Must be Spring, the fresh air and new life coming into our heads and hearts.

[Erin]

You are the creator of this blog and should do with it what you will, without pressure to "fit in" or anything else. Thank you for sharing your lovely family life. For me, visits to your blog are reminders about slowing down and appreciating the small joys; those are what help me get through the difficult parts of being a mother - appreciating the moment. Thank you for your generosity in this space.

[erin]

i'm along for the ride, grace. i feel lucky to be invited along on your journey.

[Hope]

Grace - I wanted to let you know that I love to hear to hear about the days when you are less than perfect just as much as the days when you are!!! When I read other blogs where people seem "too perfect" it often makes me feel that I cannot keep up or always need to be doing more. Knowing that "real" people like you also have their down days is what makes us relate to you more. It makes you more human to us and makes us feel as if you were one of our girlfriends sitting in our kitchen telling us about the realities of your day. Please promise that you will always stay "real" for us and use your blog in whatever way best allows that to happen. We love you and appreciate your gentle reminders to "stop and smell the roses" along the way!!!

[Mystele]

This post is wonderful. Nuf said.

[Colleen]

What an incredible post Grace; thank you so much for sharing that, I truly appreciate your words. It is this heart-felt sincerity that drew me to your blog in the first place, and has kept me coming back day after day awaiting the next post.
:-)
Colleen

[Alicia A.]

Much love to you, my sweet imperfect friend.
xo.

[a]

Thank you for the idea that realizing you are the family you want to be for even one small moment is something to treasure! We took a long walk at our audubon center today, with much the same views as yours somehow -- the tall grasses especially -- and it is something how the squabbles cease!

[Amy]

How can I not respond to a post like this?

And all I can really say is, I love reading the shared values here. And I return always (though a fairly new reader) to catch a glimpse of what you're up to and for inspiration.

Cheers!

[Nichole]

I truly appreciate this thoughtful post. The thing is I think most of us like inspiration (alot in blogworld), but we also appreciate it with a dose of reality. I like the fact that you keep it real.
Thanks Grace (:

[kyrie]

thank you grace! i am struggling with the same thing these days (hence the lack of posting). it's hard for me to know why exactly i blog, and i don't want it to be the kind of look-at-me keep up with the big guys that can trickle in when i'm not paying attention.

nothing matters more to me than my own family, and i need to remember that every time i write.

thank you friend!

xo k

[SmilynStef]

What a marvelous post and beautiful pictures ... so glad you shared.

[patience]

Dear Grace, what an elegant, beautiful post. I used to think it was important to show the negative side of our days too (although I couldn't often bring myself to do it) - but then that is blogging for other people, and that isn't why I want to blog. I want to express some of the beauty in my life, even if it is just one moment in the day or one thought I've had in passing. And I read other blogs to harvest that same beauty. I know they don't represent real life. Some do, and I don't read those blogs. Because I'm not interested in more real life, I have enough of my own. In the precious few moments a day I have for the internet, I look for beauty. Which is why I always visit you.

[stephanie]

What thoughtful words, thank you for sharing them.

[periwinkle]

What can I say that hasn't already been said, especially by Amy. I think a lot of us are 'guilty' if that's the correct way to express it , of just showing the good side and not the bad. No-one should think less of anyone who wants to express honesty, we all experience good and bad wether we like to accept it or not.
Lisa x

[Cassi]

Finding my own path is something I've been contemplating for a long time now. It is so easy to join someone else's well-worn trail but you'll never end up where you wanted to be. What makes it a wonderfully diverse and thrilling world is having everyone on their own path and crossing ways now and again. You are appreciated for what you are and not for someone you think you ought to be :)

[shelley caskey]

grace, what a beautiful and inspirational post. you've reminded us all what blogging is about. thank you for sharing your words and thoughts with us, always...

[Nicole]

This is so beautiful Grace, exactly why I first started reading your blog!!

[Kirsten]

Thank you so much for your words. I am new to blogging and trying to find my way, it is so helpful to hear your words and a reminder of what is at the core of this, and how it may be different for each of us.

[Kate]

Grace, your words were very thought provoking today.
I love your conviction about placing value on creating together as a family rather than waiting for an outside stimulus to come and sweep you along...ahmen to that!!
And I completely hear you on needing to stay true to yourself and the original reasons that compelled you to start blogging in the first place. It is so easy to fall into the trap of trying to "fit in" with the others. I think when you blog for you, rather than with others in mind, the posts are much more meaningful, at least I've found that to be true for myself.

[Michele]

I just stumbled across your blog today...wow. Your words in this post were so sincere and beautiful.

[Gypsy]

It doesn't suprise me for a minute that you do things slowly and deliberately, its people that take great care over the details that produce things of real beauty. I would never have thought a blog could be beautiful until I saw this one. Thank you!

[Barb]

I have been following your blog every day for about one half of a year. Your thoughts which you so eloquently put down in words, your beautiful crafts, your life and family choices, your photography are all very inspiring.

I choos very carefully the blogs to which I give my time. Yours is extradinary .... what would I do with my few minutes that I devote each morning to read your words if you didn't have this wonderful spot where I can stop and sit awhile and have a cup of coffee with you!!

I hope you are always here.

[Caren]

Grace, thank you for this beautiful post. I too try to record the little pleasures of the day-to-day on my blog, and also work out some of the larger things I'm thinking about, since I don't always have people to talk with "in-real-life" about the things I'm thinking... I really appreciate reading your blog as a bit of inspiration of another mother on the journey. Us readers have no particular expectations of you, so from our perspective you can never be either "perfect" or "wrong"! Thanks for your candor and presence in the blogosphere! Peace to you and your family.

[tamara]

Always inspirational...always full of Grace.

Keep sharing, growing and loving your way through each day, the rest will fall into place.

[Tamara]

I don't know how you do it Grace. You always choose the most beautiful words. I enjoy your blog so very much. It has never come across as giving the illusions of perfection. rather an honest and perfectly expressed tale of a beautiful and real life.
Whatever changes you see fit, just don't stop writting.
By the way you won one of my blogaversary prizes. Email me your address when you get a chance. Congratulations!

[Polly]

I also like the idea of finding one simple pleasure to share, rather than conforming to unwritten rules and unrealistic perfections, especially if you feel you can't share something true. You've been on my list of favourite blogs for over a year. I look forward to whatever you post next. Polly x x x